Trading Block

Snipped from the king of all Ranger$ lovers - Larry Brooks  Tues Mar 5th column:
>In addition, a well-placed source has told The Post that Sather is soliciting offers for Theo Fleury, who will
>become an unrestricted free agent next year if the Rangers don’t pick up his $7 million option for 2002-2003
>by June 15. It is unclear whether the Rangers would ask Fleury to waive his no-trade clause if they find a taker
>or whether they would attempt to move him with the same kind of waivers maneuvering they used last year to
>deal Stephane Quintal and his no-trade >contract
Captain Crackhead replies:  HOW UNFAIR !

First – we have the Ranger$ -having a WONDERFUL season this year  — Crackhead spending more time in the sin bin

—- and THIS has to surface?     The CRACK DEN does not want to see Crackhead Theo (CHT) get dealt. This would result in :


*  NO MATERIAL for this website

( if he is not on the Ranger$ – we lose the fire in the belly to carry on holding court in the CRACK DEN)

**  The Ranger$ making a positive move for their team  ( and we cannot allow THAT to happen!)
But lets take a look at 4 new potential permanent addresses for CHT.
Factoring in –
*   Playoff readiness of the team in question
**  Ability of the new team to CHOW DOWN some salary ( bye bye Penguins)
***  The “fit” for the new team
****  The ability of the NEW team to compensate the RAG$
Phoenix  Coyotes:
Ability to take on salary – not great.  Unloaded players last year in deals ( Keith Tkachuk) and let Jeremy Roenick go UFA
– with new building on horizon – might a late season addition be in the financials???
Playoff hunt – still in the mix with 67 points – battle for the final playoff spot is not out of the question
Fit of new team: Already has Claude Lemieux filling the “veteran pest” role.   Young team – could be a fit here
– can you imagine Claude Lemieux AND CHT on the same line?
Compensation to Rag$ – Oldest players on the NHL roster are Sean Burke and Teppo Numminen.
Numminen played his 1,000 NHL game tonight – all with this franchise – and Burke is too good – no old geezers available here.
Special touch:  Owner is Enabler – in – Chief – Mr. Wayne Gretzky.
Also – Phoenix is not too far away from the REHAB center in New Mexico.



San Jose Sharks  


Ability to chow down salary – its likely there – this team could do some damage in the playoffs – could use a CHT type of player.

Fit –  CHT could fit in here – to provide some scoring and grit.  Could be a good fit with Mike Ricci
Playoff Hunt – they are IN
Players that might interest the Rag$:   How about Adam Graves II ?   Matteau !  Matteau!  Both are available.
Both fit the requirement of age.     I would try to get Jeff Jillson myself – just recalled today from the minors – he will be a good one
\- but is way too young for the Ranger$.
Special touch – Great opportunity for CHT to show his changed ways – and to become a teammate to SJ SHARKIE
– the mascot he punched out !
Sharkie is SCARED this deal will go down
Washington Capitals
Fit – CHT could fit here – injuries abound — and this team needs a heart transplant
Playoff hunt – they are OUTSIDE LOOKING IN – and if they are going to make a move NOW IS THE TIME
Players that might interest the Rag$ –  Adam Oates is 40 years old – there is a neat fit there – but he is still too good.
Maybe 34 year old Frank Kucera might get the job done with a pick?
Ability to take on salary – if Time Warner AOL stock goes up – so does the Caps payroll. They can do it.
Special Touch – close proximity to a terrific Crack market – and Marion Barry will then become a season ticket holder.
Detroit Red Wings
Ability to take on salary – No worries !   These guys write big checks. 
Fit – Not so evident.  Who sits?   They will find a place – but with guys like Robitaille, Hull, Yzerman, Shanny
– he is not a top line player here
Playoff picture – you’re kidding – right?
Players that might interest the Rag$ – How about Igor Larionov?  He is 42 years old !
Special Touch – You thought Washington had a great Crack market???



Honorable Mention – St. Louis would try to get him so Detroit could not. LA????  
I could see it being a Western team.  
OH WELL –  Let me back to my CRACK DEN – till next time  –  Captain Crackhead reporting.

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